Embarassing Funny Stories, Drunk Stories, I Wish I Was Drunk

Just got back for a family a bbq where I had to sit and listen to my bitch mother-in-law talk about her hysterectomy for hours. I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (9) - You're cut off! (2)
On 26 Oct 2010 at 06:15 pm - Miscellaneous - by John
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Went to a fast food joint for a breakfast sandwich....during a massive egg recall. Guess who has food poisoning at work? Oh well, only 9 hours left! I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (4) - You're cut off! (4)
On 26 Aug 2010 at 01:42 pm - Work - by Blair
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Just finished watching hours of corny corporate videos for my new job till midnight on a Saturday. Why do companies think 80'​s graphics are still impressive? I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (4) - You're cut off! (2)
On 26 Aug 2010 at 01:41 pm - Work - by Ben
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I just went on my dream vacation to Italy. When I got to the hotel from the airport I realized somebody stole my wallet...and my passport. I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (5) - You're cut off! (3)
On 26 Aug 2010 at 01:40 pm - Miscellaneous - by Sid
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I just had to manually work my dog'​s foreskin, that was retracting back into his body, out so that his "​lipstick"​ would go back in. So gross. I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (4) - You're cut off! (6)
On 24 Aug 2010 at 02:59 pm - Miscellaneous - by Prissy
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I was creepin through the park pervin on some scandalous shit and the FBI rolled up all hard. I wish I was drunk.
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You need a drink! (10) - You're cut off! (5)
On 20 Aug 2010 at 01:20 am - Miscellaneous - by Black Stack Snuckoms
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